My goodness!! I think the Dear Amber experiment is definitely more rockin’ than floppin’. In addition to the many questions posted in the comments section, I have quite a few in my email’s inbox. I will post responses in several column-like updates. So if you haven’t sent in your question, it’s not too late.
I have a fear of being outed as a spanko. I am a 47 year old straight male who has been fascinated with spanking since I was a child. I made the mistake of telling a high school friend that I like to be spanked. He was my best friend in high school and thought I could trust him. I was wrong and he would call me Spanky when others would be around. It wasn’t until adulthood that I asked him to stop calling me that. We pretty much parted ways since we don’t really share many areas of interest. I still keep this part of my life hidden for fear of being outed. I’m sorry but I needed to supply some background to you first. My closest friend knows that I go to New York on day trips but it was only this past December when I went to New York for an overnight trip. I needed to hitch a ride to get to my New York bound bus and my friend asked me why I’m not taking my camera. I gave him some lame excuse for not taking my camera which he accepted. But now I’m going back to NYC again but I’m up against the wall. Now do I finally fess up and tell my best friend or should I continue to keep this part of my life hidden until the cats out of the bag? What should I do Dear Amber?
Dear NY Bound,
It really has to be taken on an individual basis who you can tell and who you can’t, but generally speaking, kids in high school are looking for any reason to mock, tease, belittle, and categorize. Even friends. Some people grow up and other maintain this high school mentality so you must proceed with caution. I have been outed in some circles myself and I believe I blogged at least once about my deer in the headlights moment when a former co-worker congratulated me on my new career after he saw the article on PB in the Philly Edge. Thankfully, he was sincere in thinking it was really cool. Still, I’m not about to share my kinks and interests with just anyone (family included) and I prefer to not hear or even think what might go on behind the closed doors of friends’, neighbors’, and (gag) family members’ houses. That being said, if you were to tell your best friend or have it slip out, I’d advise trying to come off as cool and non-chalant as possible. He’ll only think it’s a bigger deal if you act like it’s one. Your best friend is probably into something or other himself, and if not, then he’s the one missing out, right?
Amber
Dear Amber
When you have to take a hard spanking and it’s not a really good day, where does your head go to get you into it. Best example is a video day. You’re gonna get it good, but you’re really not in the mood. I think I remember your saying that the fact the lights are on and the camera’s rolling can inspire you to do your best, but I think all of us have some sort of thought process or image that gets us into a “break me if you can” mood. What besides having to do a good video does it for you?
Dear Moody,
As you stated, on shoot days I just try to focus on making the best scenes possible despite how I am feeling. Or I’ll even try to use my emotions to enhance the scene – anger makes me even tougher and resistant, sadness can make me cry easier, etc. I suppose that I do the same when I’m being spanked off camera. Anything that I’m feeling I’ll channel into the spanking itself. Sometimes it can prove to be extremely cathartic as I have an outlet for my emotions and it makes sense to kick and scream while being spanked. If I were to kick and scream while in line at the bank, I’d be hauled off by security. Make it work for you. A word of caution about the break me if you can type attitude – sometimes this can lead to play that crosses a line because you are not in the proper headspace to look out for your own safety. You won’t want to “give in” to the one spanking you at the time. But if this goes too far, it can lead to regret on your part afterwards as you reflect and realize you didn’t deserve to essentially treat yourself so harshly and possibly regret on the part of the spanker as well.
Amber
Dear Doctor Amber!
I’ve got one hell of a compulsion…you know…I like spanking! I guess I’m a big prevert. (Or is that pervert?) Anyways, will I go to hell because I like my butt whipped? Come to think of it, what’s the Bible got to say about my shenanigans? Can I take a pill to may this urge go away? Corner time doesn’t seem to work! (By the way, why do I get so much corner time anyway? I think I need a band aid for my nose!) If you can help me, I would really appreciate it!
Yours truly,
Dumbfounded
Dear Dumbfounded,
No no no. You won’t go to hell. Remember the Bible states spare the rod, spoil the child. And can you imagine if we continued to spoil your inner child and deprive him of a good spanking? Chaos. Corner time alone probably won’t work. It’s best used in conjunction with a spanking if at all. It may be used as either a time of reflection after your spanking or as a period of dread prior to your punishment. If your nose is so sore and raw from standing in the corner, might I suggest not using a wall with a textured surface. If this is not possible, then try placing a cotton ball between the wall and your nose. Further punishment will be added if the cotton ball is dropped. This will keep your nose cushioned and help to ensure you do not squirm around too much. Now get in the corner and try it out. Now, young man!
Dr. Amber
Dear Aunt Amber,
One of my favorite spanking sites “spankingtube.com” where I used to play and frolic, has changed it’s format. I can’t seem to get it to play anymore. Is it after my cookies or just trying to piss me off?
Your dedicated fan in the Straits of Florida, T-B
Dear T-B,
Actually it’s the cookies that are evil and the boogey man under your bed is out to eat you. Sorry!
Love,
Aunt Amber
But your illustration has me thinking: Lucy is a pretty obvious top, but who are her bottoms? Linus? Charlie Brown? Or is she a closet bottom herself? Are all of her pulling-the-football-away antics a desperate ploy to get Charlie Brown to take her OTK and spank her silly? Or would she rather bend over Schroeder’s piano for a Beethovenesque bottom-blistering? And what about others in the Peanuts gang? Is Sally longing to go over Linus’s lap in the pumpkin patch? And where to begin with Peppermint Patty and Marcie? (“Sir,” indeed!) With all the possibilities, one can only sigh and say, “Good grief!”
Dear Jeff,
Lucy is a top through and through. She is insulted that you would call her a closet bottom and will be over at 6pm tomorrow to straighten you out. All others are bottoms in her mind. Marcie was her sub at one time but she was not enough of a challenge so she hooked her up with Peppermint Patty. She then moved onto Charlie Brown who is a much more playful bottom in need of taming. Lucy was trained by Snoopy who to this day is still trying to get the neighbor’s cat under submission.
Long Live the Red Baron,
Amber
Until next time, play safe and be happy. Yours truly, Dear Amber.